Dear Arewa Women,
These are words from a broken heart, silent tears running down my cheeks just by the
thought of them. As a man I know I am in no position to understand the pain or struggle my
sisters face after a sexual assault or the fear they live in every day thinking they could easily
be the next victim.
I personally think my fellow brothers need to be taught more, they need to be instilled with
more morals and discipline. I realized that more attention is given to women on being
modest, good, and disciplined. Someone is constantly breathing down their necks, do this,
don’t do that. And all for what, for the purpose of earning acceptance by us. A woman has to
act or be a certain way for us to affirm she’s “wife material”, all that pressure placed on them
while we men are left to grow unchecked believing whatever we do won’t affect us simply
because we are men.
While the truth is it’s not only about us, our actions reflect on our sisters depriving an
innocent soul her sanity! When all her life she has protected her chastity or even worse she
doesn’t even know or have any idea of such actions, the animosity in us that was left
unchecked is left doing damage to the society.
When I think all this is bad enough, the society points fingers at our sisters claiming it’s their
fault, blaming their mode of dressing, how pathetic! Are we animals? Aren’t we blessed with
senses for control or even a choice to leave an environment with temptation in it? I might
admit sometimes our ladies dress in a provocative manner that might make us quite
uncomfortable but no man has the right to ravish any woman. I believe it’s a choice a person
makes to do wrong if provocation is the reason what do we say about the little victims if that
isn’t a choice to do evil, then what is?
I think us men should be checked on our behaviors from birth. The same way modesty and
morality are instilled in our sisters, it should be instilled in us too. Because let me tell you all a
secret when a man wants to exercise his worst behavior he doesn’t do it where he might be
overpowered or feel belittled, he does it where he is in charge and capable. This is why we
have domestic violence, rape, and all sorts of assault on women because men feel they are
I want to give these words of mine as an encouragement to all my sisters out there because
you are all mothers, cousins, daughters, and friends. I will never want anything like this to
happen to anyone talkless of one of my own.
May you all be protected from our evil.